The Fate in A Word
by season5girl
Summary: Should this be in Drama or General? Er..not sure. Not gonna give it away though!;) Bit angsty but PLEASE R/R!


DISCLAIMER: None of the chars. in this story are mine, they are all J.K. Rowling's. Don't sue me,  
you'll only get several very heavily scribbled on pads of paper, and a pencil chewed nearly  
all the way through. What? I get stressed when I write;)  
  
A/N: This story is about...take a guess!;) It's fun. Yes, I did have people in mind when I  
wrote this, but since there are SO many shipper's  
for so many different people out there, I think I'll let you all come up with your own opinions;)   
No flames please, but do R/R!! Thanks;) Enjoy!  
  
  
  
  
  
There was still light to be found in his eyes. It has dimmed over the years, I admit. Dimmed to   
something much less welcoming, much less hopeful then it might have once been.  
  
I'd known him since our school days back in Hogwarts.  
And I'd hated his name, cursing it under my breath for far longer then that.  
But I married him. Why did I marry him?  
  
Well, I was made to after all, wasn't I? I didn't go about hoping one day I'd be sitting in a   
drafty room of a gloomy house, waiting for him to come home from work.  
Or waiting for my son to give a damn about anything but making other people's lives miserable.   
  
  
I wished I could go back, go back and have had the nerve to leave it all before it engulfed me.   
Someone else, someone I'd went to school with did ask me you know.  
  
Yes...he asked me to go away with him, he didn't know where and he really didn't care. He just   
wanted to escape and leave it all behind and to take me with him. Save me from this inevitable  
fate of mine.  
I would have said yes, I almost did.  
  
  
But I told him I wanted to think about it, and when I woke up the next morning, what had seemed to  
me like only a few brief and confusing moments later, the word yes on my lips, I found he hadn't   
waited. He'd gone without me.  
  
He left a note with another friend. It said he'd had to go, he didn't want to go without me.   
But he did. He had to.   
He didn't say why he had to though. I don't even know now, I never guessed, I never wanted to.  
To guess would have been to put myself one step closer to a truth I didn't know I could handle.  
Maybe he didn't wait, because he didn't want me to come any longer. Maybe he'd changed his mind.  
Too much pain in answering such a question, there was just too much. And I didn't want anymore.  
  
I moved on. But I also left something behind with him, wherever he is now. I wonder if he knows   
he has a peace of me with him. Corny as it sounds, he has a peace of my heart my husband will   
never have.  
I won't let him.  
  
As much as I cursed my husband's name, I did love him.  
  
For some reason none of my friends understood, I loved him and I still do. None of my friends   
understand it now either. I can't say I'm any clearer on the subject.  
  
He was always so cold back in my day at Hogwarts. Always so hateful, his pale skin and empty   
stare making him look all the more frightening to the first years...and to me, but I was made to  
marry him, where as others were saved from a lifetime of that stare.  
  
And he did asked me, one night a top a hill by Hogsmeade. He just asked if I would marry him, not   
even looking me in the eyes, afraid I would see emotion, weakness he'd have said, in his eyes.   
And I answered 'yes', not looking at him at all.  
I'd finally said that dreadful word to someone. To the wrong someone, the one I'd wanted to say   
it to was gone now.  
  
I go back to that hill every now and then and I sit and think. My husband wasn't the first person  
I'd went to that hill with. The man who'd left me, he was the first.  
I miss him. I wish I could tell him just how much, but I wouldn't know how to word it, even if   
my owl knew how to find him.  
  
No one knew why he'd left, or where he'd left for. He told me once though I never mentioned it   
to anyone else, not even our closest friends. He'd said, "To someplace that isn't here, I just   
want it simple. I just need to be by myself, away from them all."  
  
A wind picked up and drifting through the always chilled Manor.   
  
I stirred as I heard my husband return home. Our son was at Hogwarts now, he wouldn't be home   
soon. He inherited his father's looks. He was handsome, and pale and blonde.  
  
My husband stood in the doorway of my room, looking at me with cold unreadable eyes. He looked   
briefly to the ground and then back to me his eyes showing 'weakness', showing emotion.   
"I know you regret it. I know that you wished you'd gone with him." I didn't answer.   
  
My husband knew as well as I did that nothing could be done about it. Yes, sometimes I did   
regret it, but I also did love my husband. And...in all truthfulness, I didn't want to leave him..  
  
He gave me a pleading sort of look, this was the first time he'd shown emotion in years. The first   
emotion I'd seen in him in years.   
He loved me.  
  
And then he turned on his heel, cloak billowing behind him, and he left the room.  
Left me alone. They all did that. They all left me alone in the drafty old Malfoy Manor.  
  
This wasn't how I'd planned my life to be. Maybe today was just a bad day for me, I stood to go   
and join my husband in the other room.  
  
I did love him you know.... The man who'd left me. I'd loved him in a way I've not felt since and   
it's doubtful I will feel it again.  
  
My heart had made me sleep on saying yes, my heart had made me marry this man instead, my heart   
had led me down a path I desperately wanted to walk back on.  
  
I was mistress of Malfoy Manor; my parents seemed pleased enough.  
His parents...well, they were always hateful people. He'd inherited a bit of that too.  
As well as his father's cold eyes.  
Though his had held such hope. Such hope as mine might show when I think of the man who'd left   
me.  
  
I did love my husband, but this was not how it was supposed to go, Hermione Malfoy just never   
sounded right to me. I cursed my husband's name, now cursing my own in the same silent breath.  
  
  
A/N: So?? *weak little whimper* was it...ok? For the info I'm also currently writing a D/H romance,  
(much happier, don't worry;P)but I wouldn't expect to see it too soon..I hate writers block.  
PLEASE don't flame me, I get burnt easily. But see that little box down there? If you write something  
in it, I'll be ever so grateful! PLEASE!:P It's funny, I seem to be getting into these "guess who  
it is" fics....*shrugs* Tootles ya'll 


End file.
